Musings of an Insane Mind

Path of the Wicked

2008-11-11T09:04:00.002-05:00

Yesterday some of my middle school guys and I began Romans for our mostly-weekly small group gathering. When I read the Bible, I spend a bit of time around each line, making sure I understand it on the surface before moving on. It's very easy the way most Bibles are written to simple read the words and not internalize any meaning from them. Anyway, as I read and try to follow along, I wait for something strange to jump out at me. Usually it's a very odd wording, or something that the author repeats over and over again. In this case, it happens to be an incredibly long list of things wicked men do. After a pretty wordy paragraph on homosexuality, Paul adds....

Romans 1:28-31
28Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done. 29They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless.

Paul lists off at least 22 forms of wicked things. My personal favorite is in the middle of all these acts, it clearly wasn't enough, so the people invented NEW ways of doing evil that didn't even exist yet. It's interesting that a lot of the things on this list are things we do occasionally. Greed, disobeying parents, senselessness, envy.... But clearly Paul pants a picture of a people that are just... so far off the deep end it's depressing. As we (our small group) were going through this passage, it's interesting to note that this whole cacophony of evil begins ever so simply. If you wonder how a people could possible fall so far into depravity, you only need to look a few paragraph up....

Romans 1:21
21For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.

Even though they knew and understood God, they never glorified him or gave him thanks. That's it....

It doesn't say they cursed him, they ran away from him, it doesn't even really say they ignored him. All it really says is that they never gave him thanks or glory. That was all it took to allow their hearts to be filled with wickedness.

When we glorify God and give him thanks for the many blessings in our lives, we keep our eyes fixed forward, and it's a lot easier to run the race when you're looking in the right direction.

My life be like...

2008-06-13T17:49:00.002-04:00

Yay for GRITS!

So the three of you that still check this site out are probably wondering, "why the heck isn't Rob updating his blog?!" Well the short answer is that I've been busy lately. When ever I change something major in my life, it always takes me a little while to get back 'into the groove' again. Selling cars has been a huge life change for me, and I've been able to hold onto a lot of things. I've gotten to spend time with some of my amazing friends, had a pretty good string of reading my Bible every day, and had a lot of fun at Church. Unfortunately, the blog has been suffering big time.

Time to wrestle that area back into my routine. The new job is going awesome! I have discovered that I really love selling as a profession. The schedule is a little tough, but aside from that, I can't complain. So if anyone wants to come see me, feel free. By the way, if anyone you know wants to buy a Honda and you send them to me, I can put $200 in your pocket! :-)

And now to enjoy my night off.

My weekend...

2008-05-19T19:16:00.002-04:00

Proverbs 17:9
He who covers over an offense promotes love,
but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.

One of the things I have to get used to with the new schedule is the random string of days off. This week for example, I had Sunday and Monday off from work, thus this is my weekend. The nice thing is that my good friends the McCart's are usually around the house and Kelly and Jennica are staying with them for a few weeks. It makes it easy to see my friends during the week.

Yesterday I went golfing with Phillip and I learned that I may never forget how to ride a bike, but I sure as heck can't remember how to swing a club. Time for some practice. Tennis today was much better though.

Saturday was my first day on the floor and I sold my first car. Lets home this is the first of many. Back to work for the next 5 days tomorrow!!

2008-05-15T11:28:00.002-04:00

Psalm 14:1-5
1 The fool ^[a] says in his heart,
"There is no God."
They are corrupt, their deeds are vile;
there is no one who does good.

2 The LORD looks down from heaven
on the sons of men
to see if there are any who understand,
any who seek God.

3 All have turned aside,
they have together become corrupt;
there is no one who does good,
not even one.

4 Will evildoers never learn—
those who devour my people as men eat bread
and who do not call on the LORD ?

5 There they are, overwhelmed with dread,
for God is present in the company of the righteous.

You know, the more I know Jesus, the easier it is to live my life and be positive. Those of you who know me know that I am rarely down about anything. That wasn't always the case. I use to be insecure, unsure of myself, and very withdrawn. I call it middle school. In high school I became much more outgoing, but still struggled with life in general. It wasn't until I put my faith in Jesus that I understood what joy was like in His presence.

Trying something new

2008-05-14T00:06:00.002-04:00

So, my spiritual life recently has been majorly slacking. I'm going to try something new and we'll see how it works out. I'm going to try to post at least one verse (that I read that day) on my blog every day to make sure I'm reading my bible and taking the steps I need to protect myself and grow in Christ. This is public permission for all my friends to get on my case if I go more than a day without doing it. I'm going to try it for a week and see what happens....

Psalm 71:17-18
Since my youth, O God, you have taught me,
and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.

Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, O God,
till I declare your power to the next generation,
your might to all who are to come.

On a complete side note, why the heck don't I read the Bible more often? It's seriously the best freaking book I've ever read and I always get something positive out of it.

Why I can't work from home.

2008-05-08T00:24:00.004-04:00

So I have had two days off from the dealership and I'm taking these days to finish up on my training modules online. They are supposed to take 3ish weeks and I'm going to knock these suckers out so I can start selling cars ASAP. I'm basically working full time from home these two days and I've realized I will probably never make a living doing this because...

There is now always something more important than dishes or laundry
I can now eat something when ever I'm hungry without depositing cash into a machine
I apparently don't shower unless I'm going out in public somewhere
When people call me I'm convinced I have time to answer the phone and talk
I can now take naps
Strange people come by my house to check oil, cut grass, look at land, read meters, or look into my windows
There's nothing good on TV
Something tells me I'm not as productive...

You know...

2008-05-08T00:17:00.002-04:00

I've noticed most of my titles tend to be open ended with a lot of periods after them. Any one else?

So, there's absolutely no point to this post. Truly without agenda other than to say that it's been a few days and it's time to update this thing. Life is pretty fantastic at the moment. I have an amazing group of middle school guys that I love to hang out with. I just started a new job that I am pretty sure will be enjoyable for me, and Jesus continues to pour into my life and teach me things on a daily basis.

It feels really good to be busy again although the trade off is NOT having time to spend with friends like I use to be able to do. My schedule is such that I get random days off with no consistency and have to work very long days. It also has been interesting from moving to a person that was very broke but had tons of time, to someone who now has precious little time and (hopefully) a fair amount of money. I need to re-evaluate my sacrifices and how I budget my resources.

It's about to get ca-razy!!

2008-05-02T22:37:00.003-04:00

Don't you hate people that hyphenate words like morons? Things like Bla-dow!, Cha-ching, or ca-razy? I do.

So, starting Monday I'll be working 50-60+ hours a week. It's going to be a tough schedule. 9AM-9PM on many days. I don't expect to see a lot of my friends on a regular basis but with a job comes additional resources so the days I have available I fully intend to take advantage of. I can't even tell you how excited I am to be working again. As much fun as it is to lounge around the house, I really hate it deep down. As lazy as I am, I absolutely thrive on being productive and working hard. I have a very weird personality...

Finally....

2008-04-30T13:03:00.004-04:00

After 6 months of unemployment and over three months of failed job hunts, I now have a job. I'll be selling cars at Honda of Concord so if anyone needs a vehicle, please come see me! :-)

On a side note, this means that I won't be moving out of Charlotte. Yay!

The success Pyramid

2008-04-25T11:20:00.004-04:00

For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 1:5-8

The saddest thing I can think of is a Christian that stuffs themselves with theology and fails to live up the great commission. A life in Christ is bleak if you just coast through. This verse really sticks out for me. I picture that stupid nutrition pyramid from grade school, with faith at the bottom and love at the top (except the pyramid is upside down because we are increasing as we move up). I think many of us get caught up in the faith or knowledge part and never struggle to move on to the higher forms. But we need all of these 8 traits to reach our Christ potential.

So where are you at right now? Do you struggle with each of these 8 areas? Are you working on increasing each trait from faith to love? Let's all work on being effective and productive in Christ.

Jesus will sneak up on you!

2008-04-23T10:27:00.003-04:00

So, my best friend Kelly and I were talking about how we met the other day. We've been friends for maybe 7 months now, and I was trying to remember exactly how we got to this place. It went something like this...

Kelly and I met at out High School event called Pulse. I remember meeting her and a visiting student pastor named JD at the same time. We talked for maybe an hour and that was it. The next week, our mutual friend Jeremy and I were sitting in service and he pointed her out. Honestly, I forgot who he was even talking about until I saw her face. "Ohhh! That Kelly" Yeah, I'm awesome like that.

So after service we caught her walking out and talked a bit. Elevation was hosting a prayer experience for the volunteers that night so we all decided to go out to lunch and then head back to the church.

Keep in mind, this is only the second time I ever met this girl...

So yeah, I can't tell you what we talked about, nor can I tell you what was going through my mind. I know that I looked back on this picture and couldn't believe it was the second time I had met this girl. "No way, that had to happen after we had known each other a while...."

Apparently not.

It suddenly became clear to me that something pretty significant was happening between us that we were totally unaware of. Now, for us to look back at how we became friends seems impossibly too quick.

All too often we pray, beg, and even demand that God works in our lives in a mighty way. I know that I am going through a time in my life where I am expecting God to fulfill the calling he has placed on me and I have been specifically looking at what he is doing in my life, and yet I totally missed all this when it was occurring. The whole point is that just because we don't see God doing anything doesn't mean the pieces of the puzzle aren't coming together beyond what we can perceive. It also doesn't mean that God isn't working on another puzzle all together.

Job pt. 3

2008-04-19T00:05:00.000-04:00

If you read chapters 1 & 2, you should get into chapter 3 and do a spiritual "what the heck?". That's right, Job becomes a poem. What, you didn't notice? Maybe you were too focused on the first verse of chapter 3...

After this, Job opened his mouth and cursed the day of his birth. Job 3:1

Yeah, that's right. After seven days of silence and support from his friends, he opened his dumb mouth and cursed his birth. Now, this is more than just Job saying he wished he didn't have to go through this pain. Job is connected to God in an intimate way. I can't say if the book of Psalms predates Job but....

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalms 139:13-14

God created Job and did so on purpose. For Job to curse the day of his birth is tantamount to Job telling God that He didn't know what He was doing. In other words, Job starts to show his arrogance and the attitude that he knows more than God.

I'll save you the long bits but most of the rest of Job goes like this...

Job's Friends: You must be a sinner. Look at your suffering. God would only do this to a horrible person. (translation, we are judging you although we have no idea what you may have done nor do we have any evidence to support these claims)

Job: I am perfect and undeserving of any punishment. I would tell God how wrong He is but God would just abuse his power and not listen to me any way. I didn't sin, I'm a perfect human being. (translation, I am the greatest thing since sliced bread and God's a mean kid)

Hmm, totally not the Job I remember hearing about. I would suggest you go through and read it if you haven't recently. The end of the story resolved with Job repenting of his sins and realizing that God is truly wonderful and his strength. What I find most interesting about the 40 some chapters in long..... LONG verbose prose that just never seems to go anywhere or stop talking and seems to make me painfully aware of my ADD is that it is how everyone talks. You just don't find this kind of stuff elsewhere in the Bible.

What I mean by this is Job and his friends are all apparently talkative people. Chapter 40 is the appearance of the Lord who speaks out of the storm and guess what.... talks in the same manner as Job and his friends. I find it interesting that God meets them on their terms and in a way that speaks to their hearts. Yup, God may not talk like this anywhere else in the Bible, but he talks like this to the people who need to hear like this. In short, God will speak to you in a unique way tailored to the person he has created you to be. Amen for that!!!

Job pt. 2

2008-04-18T14:17:00.004-04:00

(On a total side note, when you start a multi-part blog, finish them all at once so you don't feel like you can't blog until you finish the thing you don't want to get around to....)

Part 1

So, we get to chapter 2.

For starters, Satan is up to his old tricks again, asking God to remove the blessing of good health from Job. I do want to point out that Satan needs God's permission before he can harm Job. Many people seem to think that there is this crazy battle and that on a bad day, Satan gets the upper hand. That just isn't true. God is in total control of everything, even Job's adversary.

So Satan went out from the presence of the LORD and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the top of his head. Then Job took a piece of broken pottery and scraped himself with it as he sat among the ashes. Job 2:7-8 NIV

Umm, oww! I don't think I can actually imagine the pain involved in that statement. But what does our boy Job do?

His wife said to him, "Are you still holding on to your integrity? Curse God and die!" He replied, "You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?" In all this, Job did not sin in what he said. Job 2:9-10

That's our boy! Even in the face of terrible pain and his wife telling him to give up and die, he stuck to the promise of his Lord. Notice the last sentence. This is the second and last time this phrase appears in Job.

Chapter 2 wraps up with a final story of Job's friends coming to encourage him. What they find is so horrible they can do nothing but show their distress for their friend and sit with him for 7 days and nights in silence. Here's a good lesson about keeping our mouths shut some times. Unfortunately, like myself, they don't....

The blogging funk...

2008-04-16T16:50:00.002-04:00

I'm going to warn you all now this will probably turn into a huge cry fest. Umm.... deal with it?

So I've been in a huge funk recently. I have no idea where to go with any of this but the last 5 months have clearly been taking a huge toll on me. Long story short, God placed in my heart a vision to dedicate my life to ministry. Now, I realize I'm too young and too inexperienced to carry it out, but has that ever stopped God before? So armed with a vision and God's promise, I left my job and began to pursue the calling he has placed on my life.

Now it's 5 months later and I still don't have a job, and I'm still struggling to even gain any traction in my quest. Every step forward that I have taken has dissolved around me and I'm faced with the very real possibility of total, humiliating failure. Today has been especially rough. I have no idea how I'm going to come up with bills for next month, and every job that I've tried to get in the last 5 months has been met with one roadblock after another. For a while it was easy to just tell myself that God clearly wanted me to stay focused on the vision for my life, but that is getting harder and harder to tell myself.

And yet, I'm not the least bit upset with any of my circumstances. God is wonderful and has always provided. I have met some amazing people and been mentored by some amazing Christians. I have learned more about my own ability to put faith in Jesus and trust in Him than I thought was possible. I am learning to not trust in myself but that everything I do must find strength in Jesus. I wouldn't trade the last 5 months for anything in the world. If my Lord could hang on a cross for me than I can deal with what ever comes my way in the next month or two.

So if you are reading this feel free to pray for me. I need my next steps.

Job pt. 1

2008-04-01T16:06:00.002-04:00

I now realize that so much of my “knowledge” stems from the things I learned before I was a Christian. I remember the first time I learned that Christmas, Easter, even Sunday were all pagan holidays that Christians adopted. I always thought we knew when Jesus was born, when he triumphed over the grave. Then I found out that those are they days we “celebrate” the things we know happened. The story I always heard about Jonah was the first 3 chapters. I didn’t know there was a 4^th chapter until a few months ago. Turns out Jonah was a bitter jerk. He wasn’t the guy I was told about.

Now, I’m reading Job. Wow! Is this every not the story I thought it was. Job is a phenomenal book and there are literally dozens of things that come out of it, and none of them were what I thought they’d be. The story I always heard of Job is all in the first chapter. Why no one every brought up chapter 2-42 I can’t say. I want to spend a while bringing up some things I noticed while reading Job over the next few days. Today’s installment,

Chapter 1:

I read this chapter and I know there are a million things going on here that I am not smart enough to put into context. When I read a sentence that stands out and think to myself “that’s weird, why is it worded like that?” is usually means there’s a significance, I’m just not equipped to understand it. What I do know is Job is a wonderful man who has been very clearly blessed with God’s favor. God is proud of his servant to the point where he presents Job to Satan.

“Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.” Job 1:8

We all know what happens next. Satan suggests that Job is only such a great guy because of all the wonderful things God has blessed him with. So God allows Satan to get into Job’s life. And boy does he ever. Job is literally faced with a maelstrom of events. Four messengers come and tell him that all his wealth and all his family are gone, and what does Job do? He worships God. His love wasn’t based on God’s blessings but on God being God. This is the Job we all learned about in Sunday school isn’t it? Then it all kinda falls apart...

...and I took the one less traveled...

2008-03-31T13:11:00.001-04:00

There are many paths to a faith in Jesus Christ. Some grow up in church and begin a relationship at a very early age. Some repent of their sins in college, and some recognize the emptiness they’ve carried around for 40+ years can only be filled with Jesus. Depending on your story, your walk in faith will be characterized with different struggles. Some “career Christians” do everything they can just to not get complacent because it’s hard to know what you’ve got if you’ve always had it. In contrast, the drug addict that spent 10 years living on the street knows exactly what life is like without Jesus and probably doesn’t take it for granted. Instead, they have to deal with the daily temptations a life of sin etched deep into their soul that Jesus can and will heal, but it takes time.

I was 21 when I took my first step forward in Christ. I had been a Christian for two years and was sick and tired of squandering the gift of mercy that had been placed before me. My story is much like the drug addict depicted above. My joy in Christ stems from knowing, without a shadow of a doubt, what life without Jesus felt like and feeling grateful and blessed on a daily basis. I will never go back and I wouldn’t trade my circumstance for anything in the world.

The point of this is to say, what ever your story, know the strengths you gain from your situation and celebrate them first and foremost. God knew what He was doing and you are not a mistake. You have a unique perspective because of your life and that is on purpose. But also know your weakness. Know the pitfalls of your situation and be deliberate in those areas.

Crazy crazy crazy....

2008-03-26T00:07:00.002-04:00

To follow up on Fridays blog, this Friday I'll be in Danville, Va and next week I'm going to Kershaw, SC (yes, it's actually a town). I feel like all I do any more is drive and I deeply miss when gas was $1.25 a gallon. I remember the first time I put $20 in my Cadillac and I was so mad...

Life seems to be absolutely flying by since Christmas. I'm not sure where all the time has gone but I can't believe it's almost April. I also can't believe that in a little over 6 weeks I'll be turning 26. Growing up, I never understood why adults didn't look forward to their birthdays, but I understand now.

Kelly and I had a phenomenal time hanging out with Phillip and Anita this past week and we are both very excited to be spending time with Larry and Kelly Hubatka this week. I am planning to steal some time away to play with their 4 awesome girls!! I'm hoping that with Easter past, things will slow down a bit and we can all catch our breaths.

Anyway, nothing deep or spiritual this time by. Just felt like explaining why life has been a bit nuts and I haven't been able to steal much time to myself for deep thought. I am about to rip into Visioneering and I'm sure that will spawn all kinds of creativity. Until then...

Anderson, Charlotte, Atlanta, Savannah

2008-03-21T19:46:00.000-04:00

The last week has been quiet an interesting rollercoaster. Thursday I found myself in Anderson, SC at Newspring for Unleash, Friday and Saturday I took the race car up to Atlanta amidst tornados and hail storms, and was able to make it back in time for church on Sunday. Monday and Tuesday were spent putting the sale of the car together and doing some additional job hunting. I don’t really have a clue where Wednesday went aside from small groups, and Thursday was spent meeting Phillip for lunch, going to an interview, meeting Michael for dinner, meeting everyone for Lost, then crashing on Phillips couch for 3.5 hours before driving to Savannah Georgia to instruct for a race school. There’s no real point to this aside to remind myself that I’ve been in 4 different cities in the past week.

BTW, it’s 68 degrees, sunny, gorgeous blue skies, and a very slight breeze. I am chilling under my mesh canopy and LOVING this trip. See you guys tomorrow afternoon!!

And then I missed the whole point.

2008-03-18T18:56:00.001-04:00

I have struggled greatly in the last four months. I HATE anticipation. I don’t care if it’s good or bad but knowing something is coming……soon….. kills me. Pretend to poke me and I will smack the snot out of you. Punch me and it’s no big deal. Because I’m wired this way, God has never shown me much of my distant future. I couldn’t take it if he did. I know that God doesn’t typically give anyone distant knowledge, but for me it’s 100 times more than that. He won’t tell me what is in store 4 weeks away because that’s too much for me. I’m a “next step” guy and for me the next step is measured in days or hours.

Four months ago, God spoke to my heart in the most incredible way I’ve experienced since I gave my life to Christ. He told me He had plans for me in the church and that I needed to prepare myself for ministry. This was a BIG DEAL! I hated the thought of working for the church. To me, what could be worse than tedious, stressful work for minimal pay? After all, I had always planned to be a financial giver. (In truth, I was selfish and wanted my 90% or 80% to be as big as possible)

But this time was different. The notion that God would use me to reach lost people and live such a meaningful life almost crushed me. I literally wept for hours and could think of nothing else to do but pray that God would keep my incompetence out of His plan. I have never felt so unworthy, humbled, and full of His grace. Next to my salvation it is the most powerful moment in my life.

So I took steps. God shows me short term and I wanted to get on with His calling in my life. I made a lot of sacrifices to position myself how I thought I should and to explore what area of ministry to enter. I studied, prayed, read, and explored so many resources. Weeks turned into months. Time continued to tick by and I continued to remain faithful to what God was telling me. Soon, I found myself in a very tough spot. I had gone out on a limb to trust God and His direction, but things hadn’t worked out. Four months and I feel no closer now than when I started. I have failed at every attempt to move forward and I couldn’t understand why.

Until tonight at Unleash.

I don’t believe it’s arrogant to admit you have abilities or are good at something. If God puts a calling on your life He’s going to give you the ability and gifts to be successful in that area. God has put in my heart a passion and fervor for students and I believe my whole life has been preparation for this. I believe that I have the gifts and abilities to do it and do it well and yet, the opportunities didn’t appear as I expected and I knew that God was still molding and teaching me. Tonight, WHAT God was teaching has become so clear.

I have been so confident in the tools Jesus has gifted me that I have carried on these past few months on my own strength. I have the knowledge, I have the passion, I have the dedication. In truth, Jesus has everything! Somewhere along the path, between weeping on my bedroom floor and Unleash 4 months later, I lost touch with the fact that Jesus sustains me. Jesus lifts me up. Jesus is not just my everything; He is the reason for my everything! I guess I still have so much further to go….

Unleash Recap

2008-03-17T16:07:00.002-04:00

Note: This blog was written 4 days ago but I have been without internet.

Unleash has come and gone and it certainly was an experience. There are so many thoughts and feelings that I have that I wasn’t expecting.

My work with student ministry and student small groups lately has been a tremendous eye opener. I was involved in the middle school ministry at Newspring for over 4 years as a small group leader and volunteer before getting the opportunity to serve as a ministry leader within Elevation. That role forced me to look at so many things from my past and I now realize how many times I failed at being a great small group leader in the past. I hope I have an opportunity to help our new small group leaders avoid the mistakes I made and do better myself when I get my own group.
Alden Ellis and Brad Cooper were amazing during their breakout. I really expected to hear so many things that I already knew (I was involved in their ministry just 6 months ago) but they did a phenomenal job explaining not just what they did, but why they do it. They shared their goals in the ministry and related all of their activities to those. It was tremendously helpful and I am so grateful that God has placed the two of them in the position they are in.
God solidified AGAIN that I have a ridiculous passion for student ministry.
Perry Noble is amazing! I think at some point I started taking him for granted when I went to Newspring, especially the last year I was there. I don’t know if it was the separation over the last 6 months or the culture of honoring our Pastor as the man of God that is called to lead the church (thank you Elevation) that has changed my mind but I am so grateful for Perry and his heart. Seeing him up on stage preaching and sharing gave me such a tremendous amount of respect for him and I really want to apologize for taking him for granted. Perry had such a tremendous impact on my walk and I don’t know why I let that fact slip away. Every step I took in the first 4 years of my walk with Christ I took at Newspring Church. Thank you so much Perry for being unapologetic and uncompromising in bringing the word of God. Thank you for pouring yourself into the church, your staff, and your congregation. And thank you for pouring your resources into Elevation and Pastor Steven!
On that same note, Perry’s message was fantastic. Coming from Orange Tour a month ago, I was expecting witty teaching, radical new ideas, and creative activities. What I got was the word of God, the word of God, and the word of God. Unleash for me was a time to reflect, refocus, and reexamine things. Perry once again spurred me in my walk with Christ and as a “leader” there is no greater concept than ultimate hunger for Jesus.
Just before coming to Elevation, God really pulled my heart away from Newspring. I knew and saw all the amazing things around me but I just couldn’t engage with them on the same level anymore. Even when I came back to visit, it never was the same. Today though, about 20 miles away, I started to get tremendously excited. I mean Elevation Level excitement!! By the time my feet hit the parking lot I wanted to scream and hug every volunteer there. My heart was bursting with joy at the sight of the church and the volunteers. Seeing old friends and being continuously welcomed in amazing over the top ways made my day. I want to thank each and every one of my friends, pastors, and volunteers because you reminded me how important those relationships are/were and how much I value our friendship.
Every volunteer at Newspring was a freaking nut and it was amazing!!!! Put some blue shirts on them and they could have passed for Elevators. It was crazy for me to see my old friends run up to me, scream, high five, and get pumped to see me. The ridiculously awesome thing though, was to see dozens of volunteers that I’ve never met before and had no idea I use to be one of them do the exact same thing. Kudos +2 for the volunteers at Unleash!!

OK, those are enough random thoughts for tonight. I have an entirely separate blog planned for what God taught me at Unleash that I’m going to start working on right now.

Unleash

2008-03-11T12:32:00.002-04:00

It's coming and I'm pumped! Elevation is taking 150 volunteers to Newspring's conference this year and considering most of my friends at church are part of that volunteer base, I get to go on a field trip with all me new friends. And, I get to go see all my old friends. I didn't realize how much I missed everyone and I am so excited to be going back to see how things are going.

I am so grateful that God has placed me in this city and at a church that values the volunteers that work so hard every week. I fully expect a party Elevation style!

Hunting 2

2008-03-06T10:35:00.003-05:00

Still job hunting. I've had a few interviews so far but nothing concrete. It occurs to me that I really wish I learned things faster so that God would move faster in my life. One of the things I'm learning is that I need to chillax a bit and take a breath every now and then. Recently, I've realized that I want to see things develop at a very fast pace, and letting things take their time is annoying. I'm working on it....

My life is a headache...

2008-03-04T15:49:00.003-05:00

I don't know what it is about my head but it is always causing me problems. Either my sinuses are trashed because of dust or allergies, or I get headaches. So far I have found I get headaches when I...

Don't eat enough (high metabolism)
Drink a lot of soft drinks then stop (caffeine withdrawal)
Have an irregular sleep schedule
Sleep restlessly

Then there are the times I get them and don't know why. One thing is for sure though, if I go to sleep with even a mild headache, I wake up with a bad migraine. I have learned to take Advil before going to sleep or else I will ruin the next day almost guarenteed. Last night, I went to sleep with a headache. I woke up three hours later with a bad migraine. Why? Because I was to lazy/tired/stupid to take some Advil.

Isn't it interesting how we all wander into sin the exact same way? If we are honest, we know better don't we? We know when we're on the edge of a dangerous situation, and we know how to get out of it. How many guys have gone down the wrong path because they were careless on the internet one night? How many girls have slipped because they couldn't walk away from a relationship they knew was going to be damaging?

When the Holy Spirit is shouting at us that we have a headache, we need to take our Advil and stop the process before it leads to a full blown migraine. It's always the little things that lead to the full blown mistakes!

Hunting

2008-02-28T22:08:00.003-05:00

No, not little bunnies. I've been job hunting. I forgot how annoying it is. Spend most of the day sifting through a ton of jobs, apply to the few that might actually work out for you, and wait. And then, wait some more.

I suspect it will be very frustrating. I think I'm going to try visiting some of the temp agencies in Charlotte. If anyone knows of any jobs available please let me know.

What is the deal with technology?

2008-02-26T11:37:00.002-05:00

Friday afternoon I was working on my computer. Around 5PM I turned it off and drove down south. A few hours later I went to turn the computer back on and was greeted with "Failed to load Operating System".

Some random file on some obscure section of my hard drive decided to corrupt, rendering the boot sector a total wash. Now, my computer isn't vital to my daily activities. There's nothing I need to do on it to survive, yet I spent two days doing almost nothing because I just didn't know how to function without it. Technology has become so integral to our lives that without it we have trouble falling into our groove don't we?

The crazy thing is that it's only going to get worse (or better. Glass half full?) because technology is entering every part of our lives. As we near the end of our natural lives they are predicting computers will be so cheap they can literally be implanted in everything. The fibers of our clothes, the asphalt in the road, inside paper....

My grandchild will likely have a supercomputer the size of an iPod that he carries around with him to keep him safe and organized. So I guess now would be a good time to say there is really no point to this rant aside from the fact that it really has become clear to me in the past few days how much we now rely on technology and how much more so that will be the case in the future.

Interesting side note, 3 of the last 5 books I've read have been on my laptop.

Thursday!!!

2008-02-21T19:43:00.005-05:00

It's Thursday again! That means lost at Phillip's house. I can't believe I'm as excited about this show as I have been considering I barely watched it before this season. Anyway, going to Phillips tonight, in a few hours actually which is a bit weird because the whole staff is at C3 this week so really we're hanging out with Anita and the girls! Now that I think about it, I'm pretty stoked for that too!

Completely unrelated, Savannah Grace asked her mom if I could babysit some time. I seriously freaked for a second because I realized how screwed I'm going to be if/when I have daughters. How on earth am I going to say "no" to my daughter?! I am praying for boys. (you know, after I start dating and all)

On second thought, I'll take the Hubatka girls in a heartbeat!! Kelly, any time you want to loan them out!!

The Wall

2008-02-20T09:34:00.003-05:00

We've spent the last two weeks turning our student ministry on it's head, creating small groups and adding a ton of new volunteers. I'm pretty sure in the last two days I've worked 20 hours and there's no sign that there will be any decrease in the volume for a few months.

Don't get me wrong, this isn't my venue to vent at all the work we're doing. It's been nothing short of a blessing in my life. I wonder if this is how Nehemiah felt as he was rebuilding the wall. The gravity of what we're doing and where God is taking this ministry under the direction of Phillip McCart overshadows the amount of work that needs to be done to accomplish it. Even our new volunteers can feel it. I am so grateful for the work they are doing and for the first time since getting involved with our student ministry, it's starting to feel like a family.

I'll try to be a faithful blogger from now on, but no promises! :-)

Who's Listening?

2008-02-05T23:08:00.000-05:00

I learned a few years ago that I tend to be a very bad person to talk with. If you engage in a conversation with me in a crowded room, I am almost guaranteed to be looking all around while you're talking to me. I'm still listening to you, but my brain likes to distract me. If we are talking in my house or office, I usually try to multi-task while we're talking. Usually, I just walk away mid-sentence. I learned a few years ago to let people know I was still listening because it got awfully annoying when people stopped talking to me as I walked away.....

Then, there is the particularly unique way I listen intently to people. Usually, when I am being explained something deeply important, I stare at the ground. The only thing I can figure is that I'm starving my brain of stimulation so that it has to intensely concentrate on what I'm hearing. Kind of like whispering so that the people around you have to concentrate. I hate listening. I am not an auditory learner.

Last week Pastor Furtick pulled me on stage during the third service. I had absolutely no idea what was going on, but before I knew it I was literally a foot away from him as he was preaching. Believe me when I say that he was bringing it too!! I did the first thing that came to mind, I looked straight down and tried to focus on what he had to say. The next thing he said was "look at me!" I wish I had a picture of my face. I was probably horrified.

I was thinking about this today some more. A lot of times I feel like I'm having a conversation with God, but He isn't even looking in my direction. And, it seems the more I scream and insist He looks at me, the more His focus is elsewhere. Of course, the reality of the situation is much different. Just because He isn't responding to me in the way I expect, I think he isn't listening but that just isn't the case. God is always listening and He loves me intensely each and every day and I am grateful for it.

And Pastor Steven, I just wanted you to know how incredible it was to stand next to you as you preached the word of God. The calling on your life is a very real thing and it was a huge honor to stand in your presence during that time. I haven't looked at my Bible the same way since.

My need

2008-02-02T22:16:00.000-05:00

The last two days have been very heavy. I have spent 13 hours at a conference, 8 hours in conversation about changes and challenges, a few hours wrestling with my calling and God's positioning of my life, and gotten through about half of "Making Vision Stick" by Andy Stanley. I made it home around 9PM tonight, and just hung out in front of the TV for a bit to unwind. When my movie was over, I reached for the book again so that I could finish it up before going to sleep.

That's when I looked at it for a minute, and put it down. Instead, I picked up my Bible and turned to Nehemiah; because what I don't need any more of tonight is another outsider to speak into me. What I need tonight is for God to move within me and for me to just listen.

Beyond Limits (part 3)

2008-01-23T11:34:00.001-05:00

Please read Beyond Limits part 1 & part 2 before this or it probably won't make much sense.

In part 1 we talked about the difference between a limitless God and the limitations of humans. Part 2 talked about the comparison we often make between ourselves and others, when the only one that matters is the comparison between us and God. For part three, we're going to talk briefly about capacity.

Let's forgo the numbers for a moment and use water as an analogy. We'll call God all the oceans in the world since it is a fairly large concept (even though God in infinitely larger). Let's say that we, as creatures with limits, have containers that vary in size from cups to swimming pools. Still with me? Ok, I'm holding a cup of water. In that cup are all my issues, all my strengths, all my abilities and problems. If I were to take that cup to the beach and pour it into the ocean, how much bigger would the ocean get? Even if every molecule of H2O spread out, would the ocean even rise one molecule? For all real purposes, the ocean would be totally unaffected. Imagine the same scenario with a swimming pool. Would all the molecules spread all over the globe and raise the oceans? Most likely not.

So then why do we hesitate sometimes to bring our issues to God? Other people can only handle us to a certain extent. Enough cups of water and you'll fill a swimming pool. Get two people together with cups and they are very limited in what they can take from us. But if you see God as an infinite ocean that can always take everything we put on Him, maybe we'll be more likely to turn to Him right away instead of hesitating. He'll never fill up. He can always take everything from us and be ready for more.

Now, reverse the scenario. How much smaller does the ocean get if you take out a cup of water? The coolest thing about God having infinite capacity is that He has infinite supply. He can fill my cup, your swimming pool, and everyone else's and still be just as infinitely huge as ever. Moreover, I can only pour so much of myself into other people (look at part 2 for why we need to pour into others) before my cup is empty. God, can pour enough into my cup that it overflows and I can never run out. Through God, I can tap into an infinite supply and pour into others with more to spare. He will never run out, and will never reach a limit. We need to connect to that source and trust in it.

Beyond Limits (part 2)

2008-01-22T13:09:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the delay. Bonfires, race cars, church, and everything in between seemed to get in the way.

This is a continuation of Beyond Limits (part 1)

So the cool thing about finite creatures and infinite God is the amount of metaphors that come from this. We already saw briefly how impossibly small we are compared to God. Billy Graham may be 10 trillion, and I may only be 50, but when compared to an infinite God, we are both impossibly small.

So why then do some of us spend our lives trying to grow in knowledge? Well, there are things that knowledge is good for. For starters, as finite creatures with a limited capacity, knowledge helps us to understand God within the capacity of our own selves and possibly our micro-universe. I say possibly because limited knowledge can be misleading if God is acting on an infinite scale in the world around us. (we'll get into this point another time) Secondly and probably most important of all, the knowledge that God blesses us with is a wonderful tool for helping those around us. If an infinite God pours bits of himself into us, we are then able to touch those around us with a piece of infinite resources. We'll go deeper with this topic in part 3.

Unfortunately, some of us pursue knowledge for wrong reasons. If we seek to learn more about God just to be smarter, what is the point? If I spend my whole life growing from a 50, to 10 trillion, how far away am I still from true knowledge? You guessed it, still infinity. I can spend my whole life learning, seeking, and growing, but at the end of my life, I am still impossibly far away from the truth. My life has been spent chasing an impossible task. I can never know the answers. I might know some of them, but in the end I would be like a little boy trying to scoop up handfuls of sand so that I can carry the whole beach.

Seek knowledge so that you can grow closer to God. I pray that He will reveal the parts of himself that we need most to accomplish our tasks in this life. I pray that he will use us and our capacity to make a difference and that we will spend our lives impacting those around us.

Beyond Limits (part 1)

2008-01-17T20:54:00.000-05:00

It's time for a math lesson.
Oh Crap! Did he just say ....... MATH!?
It's ok, you should be able to stick with this one easily enough.

Lesson 1:
What is greater, 50 or infinity?

OK, I hope you said infinity.

Lesson 2:
How much bigger is it?

Infinity times bigger right? Makes sense. If the number "50" cannot go beyond it's fixed limit, and if the number "infinity" keeps going and going and going, it makes sense that it is infinitely times bigger.

Now which is bigger, 1 million or infinity? Again, "infinity" is larger. How much larger? Infinity times larger. What about 100 trillion and infinity? Again, the same result. The fact is simply that nothing with limitations, boundaries, or definition can ever out-pace something that is infinite, without boundaries or limitations. And it doesn't matter how much bigger the number on the left is, the difference is always infinity.

It's important to realize that God is infinity. He is beyond limits, beyond definition, beyond boundaries. We, as finite creatures can never measure up by definition. We will always be impossibly small compared to an infinite God. Stay tuned for the conclusion of this point tomorrow and to see a few other neat points about this lesson.

2008-01-16T09:59:00.000-05:00

One concept in management is the importance of setting goals. They need to be challenging yet attainable in order to challenge us to achieve them without discouraging us from giving our best. They also need to be clear and measurable so they are understood and so we can gauge how well they have been met.

The reason we set goals in management is because of an underlying concept. We must be moving towards a goal. There needs to be a direction and it needs to be in line with the overall goals of the organization.

Once goals and directions are in place, you can examine you systems to determine how effective they are in achieving your goals.

This was all driven home for me now that I am helping out with Pulse, our high school ministry. When I came on board, we had no staff members casting vision or giving a direction for the ministry. Now that Phillip McCart our family pastor is here, we are rooting out the direction of Pulse, and we have clear goals that our ministry needs to achieve. Unfortunately, this Sunday it was very evident that our current volunteer system is not accomplishing that goal. It's partly frustrating to me because we've spent 3 months building this model and we're going to have to change it again, but at the same time encouraging because the new system will really allow us to better utilize our amazing group of volunteers.

I'm sure that we're now moving in the right direction and I'm grateful for the leadership of Phillip and the outstanding group of volunteers that are dedicated to serving Jesus and forming relationships with our students.

Importance

2008-01-14T13:44:00.000-05:00

I'm slowly learning things that I should already know, but am slow to pick up on. This week at Elevation was informative to me because I realized how unimportant we all really are. We were missing a few key people Sunday morning, but things went on as they always do. I started to reflect on that fact. How important am I really?

I like to think the job I do matters, and that I do it in a way that no one else could, but in the end, how important am I really? I realized that deep down, the church doesn't need me. Sure, if I disappeared tomorrow I would be missed (I hope so anyways), but the world would keep on spinning.

But even more important is that no one person at this church is vital to it. Even Pastor himself can take a week off, and things would continue. Does that mean he isn't important? Absolutely not. Every person volunteering and serving at church is important and is living out God's calling in their lives, but they aren't more important than the Church. That's the key. Jesus Christ is the one and only person that needs to show up every Sunday for this thing to work.

Evolution

2008-01-09T12:02:00.000-05:00

When I first became a Christian and started exploring God, it was like He slowly painted a picture for me. Every thing I learned was a new line of the image. Every relationship I formed, every thing he taught me, added another color. And finally, when it was all over, when I understood "Christianity", the picture was complete and I had something to look at, visualize, and wrap my mind around.

The problem, was that I felt like I was looking at a 4x6 picture of a mountain, all the while my soul cried out, trying to tell me what a mountain really was. I couldn't shake the feeling that my picture was horribly simple and didn't even begin to do justice to what the reality really was. Much like looking at a picture of Mt Everest, and actually standing on top of it, I had to know what was really behind the image.

So my search for truth didn't stop at the image. I spent more time exploring God, and a crazy thing started to happen!

I think I expected the picture to get more complex; 3 dimensional maybe, or become larger, or have more detail. I expected God to continue to reveal himself in the same way, only better. What started to happen though, was that my image of God, Christianity, and Truth all started to dissolve. They began to fade away because no image could ever seek to explain the real thing. No picture could ever replace the experience, the emotion of standing on a mountain peak. The hard thing for me now, is explaining just what that looks like. As a finite being, any definition, any image, any word that I can use to describe an infinite God, puts limits and boundaries on what He really is. The image dissolved because in order for me to discover more, the boundaries had to dissolve.

My image of God has been replaced with emotions, feelings, and certainty. Things without boundaries or limits. Only these things can express something beyond limits and boundaries. When you seek God beyond the limits, be prepared for Him to shatter your ability to understand and express what He really is.

Quick Snippets

2008-01-07T09:52:00.000-05:00

Walk with me through the land of ADD....

"Either you stay desperate for God or He will make you desperate for Him." I really like this quote and try to remember it so I don't forget to stay desperate and connected

This past Sunday at Elevation was crazy. 3500 attendees, 135 salvations, 1001 more guests than our previous service....

I was able to confirm two new volunteer leaders for our High School ministry. We now have a mingle team leader who is amped to connect with students and help others do the same as well as a High School greeters leader who has so much potential and is such an amazing Christian. I can't wait for God to bring in some more. This ministry is on the fast track to amazing!

I just found out I get to be the series director for the NASA Endurance Series this year. 6 races on Fridays that last 3 hours or more. The car is coming along nicely and my co-driver is an ex-ALMS, ex-Koni Challenge racer with tons of experience. I expect to learn a lot from driving with him.

Finally, this is a neat bit of imagery that Craig Groeschel posted on prayer. I really liked it.

2008-01-03T23:29:00.000-05:00

Parents explain the world by simplifying things down into ways children can understand. No one would expect a parent to use the history of society or the behavioral traits of nomadic tribes to explain to a child that friends are important. Instead, adults simplify the message so that the key points make it through to the child. Now, every child has a different propensity for understanding messages. Some kids are just brighter than others; some naturally understand certain concepts and struggle to grasp other ones. As such, a parent will tailor a message to each child in a way that will maximize the impact based on that child's ability to comprehend and utilize the information. The important thing to see is that, although the child cannot possible understand the total scope of the idea, they can behave as if they do when taught properly.

In other words, a child may not understand the importance of shared society, social benefits of groups, or job specialization, but they can be taught to share and be kind to others. They can behave as if they understand the importance of social interactions and get the key parts correct, even without an understanding of the whole scope.

I believe that God acts in a very similar way with us, only on a much more intense scale. Eventually, a child will grow up into an adult, and their propensity to understand will be equal. Humans on the other hand, are finite beings with a limit ability to understand. When compared to an infinite God we cannot even begin to comprehend the separation between the scope of things and what we are exposed to.

God cannot show us the whole of everything. God can't even show us the whole of something. Instead, He has to simplify things down in ways we can understand, and just as the children above everyone has a different propensity for understanding. I think God shows different people different parts of Himself and in different ways. The end result of this is that two different people can sit next to each other, with totally different views of God, and both be 100% right. Interestingly, they are both probably very ignorant. I think that you can lock yourself up for 70 years, and spend so much time learning about God that you make Billy Graham and Joel Osteen look like pre-schoolers, and you'll still only have scratched the surface.

The point, is that we can never understand God or even really know Him. (in the knowledge sense, not the personal relationship sense) What we can do is trust Him to teach us the things that we need in order to behave in the manner He wants us to. We won't get the same things that everyone else does, because we have a different capacity than those around us; however, we will get what is best for us. I look at those around me and rejoice for what God is showing them, even if it doesn't make sense to me. I look within myself and I am blown away that an infinite God would invest into a finite being. I pray that I am faithful in what I am given and I pray that I never forget that all the knowledge in the world is nothing in comparison to the God of the Universe.

2007-12-25T23:33:00.000-05:00

It's been a while since my last blog but the Christmas time seems appropriate enough to do it. Honestly, I feel less like Christmas and more like Thanksgiving at the moment. Maybe it was the huge turkey diner I just had, or the fact that God has been humbling me in a most unique way lately, but I feel extremely grateful right now and I'm not sure why. I am sure though, that I dig it and I hope and pray that God keeps humbling me in the same manner.

On a side note, my life feels so scattered right now. Maybe it's because I am spending the holidays all over the place, and seeing friends and family that I'm not use to. It is possible it's just because I'm physically out of my element. Then again, it's possible that my life truly is being scattered about right now. Some things I feel are good to be scattered around, others I am desperate to hold onto.

Finally, I see the stage being set in so many areas in my life at the moment. I really feel like things are about to either blow my mind or blow up in my face. I'm not sure how I feel about it all to be honest with you.

Philippians 4:6-7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

What's it all for?

2007-12-14T18:41:00.000-05:00

This is an expansion on a previous post about vision.

Proverbs 29:18a
Where there is no vision, the people perish...

Deep deep down I think the most important thing I can have as a Christian is perspective. A strong sense of perspective is both powerful and laughable at the same time. Ultimately, when compared to God our, sense of perspective is indeed laughable and it's important to realize that no matter how much we think we can see, God sees abundantly more. However, perspective is incredibly important.

Our sense of perspective dictates everything about our ministry and our lives as Christians. A narrow view will result in a very narrow response. A broad view will result in a much more open response. Which is right? It depends on the situation. If your voice reaches a narrow audience, the more targeted your perspective and view, the more directly you can speak into them. If your audience is diverse, a broad perspective will lead to an impact in a majority, but may only get you so deep before you lose your influence with individuals that have a different vision than yourself.

Put it another way. Lets pretend that everyone is represented by colors and shades. If I think red, and everyone around me thinks in reds, pinks, and burgundies, than I have a great chance to impact them, and yet we all miss out completely on everything from orange to purple.

If the people around me are completely mixed up, and I think in "rainbow", then I will have the chance to speak into many lives. But when my blue friend starts to hear about yellow and red, he will probably turn away. Likewise with all my single colored friends. Now, if I can find a few that also have similar thoughts (perspectives, visions, etc), than we can take it much much deeper.

So what the heck does any of this mean? Simply that perspective is vital to vision. When we cast vision to our team, what we are really doing is putting our ministry (or mission) into perspective. We seek to show our place in the grand picture. How big our picture is dictates how deep we can take our areas. If the "big picture" is focused (IE reach a city) than bringing in a bigger picture is counter productive. It prevents us from deepening our influence. If the picture is broad (reach the world) than a smaller perspective can choke.

Anyway, my ADD has completely taken over this blog and I have no idea where all this rainbow and vision/perspective stuff came from. The original point was that perspective is vital and at the root of all we must do. It dictates our response to vision, ministry, people, life, you name it. As such, we all should really spend time thinking about our perspective and ask God if he needs to expand or focus us.

2007-12-13T12:04:00.000-05:00

Psalm 46:10 (NLV)
“Be still, and know that I am God!
I will be honored by every nation.
I will be honored throughout the world.”

My blog life has sucked recently. Interestingly enough, where my last hiatus was simply because I wasn't spending enough time with God (therefor I fast ran out of things to talk about) my recent blog deficiencies have been a result of busing myself for the Lord.

My job situation has been both a fantastic learning experience in strengthening my faith in the Lord, and an excellent opportunity to serve in a greater roll than I have been able in the past. I've taken on some projects for the church in both the children's and student ministries, as well as been available to poor into the lives of my peers more than ever before. Aside from being broke (and yet still having plenty of money to feed myself and pay bills, go figure) it's been a pretty awesome experience.

With that said, I notice myself swinging the other way. Instead of being too far in the city to see the forest, now I'm in danger of being too close to see the forest for the trees.

So todays blog is to remind myself and the 3 people that still read this thing that we all need to take a break every now and then and chillax for the Almighty.

If I could...

2007-12-04T09:13:00.000-05:00

If I could, I'd invent something that instantly told me what a person was passionate about and what their strengths were. Wouldn't that make life so much easier?

Right now I'm trying to figure out how I can identify a few people to step up into leadership positions in our High School ministry with a very limited understanding of what makes them excited every morning. I wish I had something to tell me "this person is outgoing and loves pouring into the lives of people" so I could plop them into a team leadership roll. Or find another who is "super organized and wanted to work behind the scenes" so they could help with all the planning leading up to events.

The point is, I want to find people who are passionate and plug into that. I don't know much but I do know that a ministry filled with leaders who are passionate about the areas they are in charge of has enormous potential.

One way....

2007-11-29T13:02:00.000-05:00

Just about every really good evangelist or preacher that I've heard speak has at one point or another, invited us to test our Christianity. "God isn't scared of your questions" I remember hearing quite a few times throughout my earlier years as a Christian. I think this is a remarkably awesome concept! We should examine who we are in Christ, who Christ is, and why we believe it to be so. The problem I have, (of course I do....) is that the same people that tell you to question your faith get upset if you arrive at answers different than the ones they have.

For example, what if you were struggling with the concept that God was going to send your Muslim friend to Hell because they didn't believe in Jesus. Your friend is a phenomenal person, selfless, gives up their time and resources to help those around you, and frankly, is one of the best images of Christ in your life. You attend church one Sunday, and your (Baptist/Methodist/Lutheran/etc) preacher tells you God isn't afraid of your questions, so you start to question what really happens to your friend. Through that process, you become a sort of Universalist. You hear God tell you that He can and will reconcile your friend in His own way, a way beyond your understanding. You learn that He is in control in a way far more complex and beautiful than you had ever imagined, and you fall more in love with Him than you ever thought possible. Lets all postulate for a moment what you think would happen if you went back to that preacher and told him you were a borderline Universalist. Can you imagine that conversation in his office?! Talk about the hot seat!!

The point of all this is not to pick on Prodistant preachers (Jesus loves them and so do I!) but to illustrate that the Church is quick to tell us to explore our faith, but slow to allow us to stray beyond what is considered "acceptable Christianity".

The whole point of Christianity is to have a PERSONAL relationship with Jesus Christ. Imagine if I introduced you to a friend of mine, then scripted how you must act around him for the rest of your life. I told you what topics were OK to talk about, I told you how to dress around him, how to answer his questions, and what parts of your life you had to change so he would like you more. That isn't a personal relationship, it's a scripted play. To really engage with someone, YOU have to be the one writing the script. My personal relationship with Jesus is going to look different than yours. It has to by definition. I can no more teach you how to develop a grown up relationship with Jesus than I can script your friendships in your daily life.

So what does that look like to step out and explore? Well, for starters we need to start examining what we believe and why we believe it. We need to toss out our ideas of salvation, Hell, the trinity, Heaven, Angels, the devil, .... Jesus, all of it. We need to stop believing what the Church has taught us and start believing what God is teaching us. We need to connect with God and let Him rebuild our faith in a personal way that He and only He is capable of.

I seriously hope that anyone reading this right now is slightly offended or thinks I'm nuts. If you already agree with me than I haven't done a good enough job stating the fact that I CANT SCRIPT YOUR FAITH. This means that even what I'm saying you should question before God. With that out of the way, I hope you all see the danger in this.

What if I stop believing in Jesus?
What if I decide there is no God?
What if I find Christianity isn't right?

In short, what if this very act destroys your faith. Isn't what I'm talking about very dangerous? In truth, I can't think of anything more dangerous than questioning the very fabric of your faith and beliefs. If you desire to know God in this way, you must put your faith on the alter. We do it with our money, our relationships, our jobs, our life (salvation anyone?)...why have we never put our faith on the line for Jesus?

Please understand I don't type this lightly. I have witnessed firsthand what happens when someone questions everything and comes up short. I have seen a close friend fall from the church into a life of uncertainty and confusion. It would be so easy to encourage my friends to simply accept what is around them and blindly follow, but I just don't believe that God wants a bunch of blind sheep obeying the Church without question. I believe that God wants us to risk everything in His name and I believe that my God is sovereign enough to bless those that are willing to do so.

And now the disclaimer. (I can't tell you how much I hate doing these but words on a page are so easy to misinterpret) I think the Church is amazing and I think that Jesus loves it with all his heart!! I think that everyone needs to be taught Christianity just like a 5 year old needs to be taught lessons in school. But just like every child grows past the point of instantly believing everything an adult tells them, we too as Christians, must reach a point where the Church has carried us as far as it can and we need to step out and critically examine the world around us. At some point the Church stops being your "grown up" and starts becoming your partner in service and faith. Also, I am sure (and hope) that people reading this don't agree with me. Like I said, it is all about a personal relationship with Christ and if your path leads you to the conclusion that I'm totally bonkers, than I praise God for your journey and hope you are willing to spark those around you in a similar quest, and support then regardless of the outcome.

The sense of depth

2007-11-26T11:59:00.000-05:00

Perspective is such a vital component in life. Without it, we become two dimensional. Our sense of urgency and duty can become so skewed and we can waste so many resources on such frivolous things.

I'm going to keep up the world focus theme of the blog that has arisen recently and shift focus to Africa today. I remember the first time I heard about the war in Uganda via Invisible Children but it is so easy to lose sight of anything beyond our shores. There are some new videos and such up that we all need to spend some time with today and remember to put things into perspective.

Don't lose sight of the great commission. Don't lose sight of our call to help the poor and suffering. Don't lose sight of our duty as Christians and human beings to wake up and fix the world around us in a real and meaningful way. Use your resources wisely and always seek to deepen your perspective.

Now please watch the human side.

More than a feeling....

2007-11-23T19:22:00.000-05:00

Early in my walk I couldn't shake the feeling that something didn't line up with my view of God and what the church taught me, although I couldn't say specifically what. I think the feeling was really based on the fact that many things didn't line up from my life experience and what Christianity taught me. So I started asking questions...

As a human, I seek to understand the world by defining in words things around me. Explaining things in tangible, real ways. The problem with exploring God in this way is attempting to define an infinite being in a finite language. The more I asked questions and sought to understand God by defining things, the more my existing definitions started to disappear. In the end, God ended up replacing so much of my explainable definition of who/what He was with simple feelings.

That's what God really is when you get down to it. A sentence can't even begin to define God but a feeling is a passionately emotional thing. A feeling exists in every part of your body, evoking a reaction thought out each and every part of you.

On the other side of that particular journey, God reconciled all of my problems, but I can't explain a single one in a way that makes sense or fits really. All I can say is that God has left me with feelings. I feel what God has instructed me to do, what I know he can reconcile because of his greatness, and I feel who God is. It's so much better than being able to define it!!

Plus grand que vous.

2007-11-21T09:45:00.000-05:00

Growing up has been a pretty amazing experience for me. I have been surrounded by the rich and elite, middle class, and less fortunate. I have lived in New England and the South East. I have experienced life on the West Coast, Europe, and Asia. My first memory was riding a donkey in Greece at the age of 1. I spent the first two years of grade school in Tokyo, Japan. I had my 7^th birthday in Hong Kong. (I had cake with whole strawberries in it…. Yuk!) I have walked on tropical beaches next to armed guards with Uzi’s. I have been to countries that you can no longer travel to safely. I have had friends growing up that were Jewish, Hindu, Muslim, gay, and every nationality you can think of.

What I really treasure from my childhood is the attitude that it afforded me. I feel so blessed to be where I am. Even at my poorest moments in life, I always knew I was so lucky compared to the cities I’ve been to in Thailand for example. Further more, I’ve always felt that Americans are so isolated geographically and it is so easy to become disconnected from the world around us. I’ve learned so much from all the different cultures, people, and experiences I’ve been around, and it has really shaped the person I am now.

As a Christian, I’ve evolved this cultural philosophy into my faith and view of God. I realized it was pretty vain to assume that the American Protestant Christianity was God’s intended purpose all along. When you realize that African Christianity is so different from South American Indian Christianity, and both are so different from our own, you have to ask yourself “which one is God in?” The obvious answer is all of them. I have learned that the more you get out into the world and the more you step outside of your sphere of influence, the more you learn how big God really is. I think it is vital to bring different styles and cultures into our knowledge base so that we never become victims of a limited vision of God and never fall into the trap of believing that our way is “the best and only way”.

Anathema

2007-11-20T22:19:00.000-05:00

I've wanted to use this word for so long and I am stoked I finally get to do it.

Anathema:
1. to be formally set apart,
2. banished, exiled, excommunicated or
3. denounced, sometimes accursed.

But there is more to the word itself. The word we now translate as "anathema" in English comes from the Greek word ἀνάθεμα (ä-nä'-the-mä) as found in 1 Cor 12:3. Here it is used to say that no one shall call Jesus "accursed" however there is also a very different meaning for the word. ἀνάθημα (ä-nä'-thā-mä) also translates to "anathema" in English but is used in Luke 21:5 to describe a "gift" that is set apart or raised up to God. Something set aside and very positive.

In modern english, the positive version is never used. It always means "accursed" even though it once had a positive connotation. So who the heck cares?

Well, it occurred to me that the term "Christian" has become anathema to the world in recent times in both the direct translation, and as a metaphor for the transition. What once had a positive connotation has now become synonymous with being accursed. I think that's why so many people have tried to rename themselves.

I remember the first time I heard someone say they weren't a Christian but rather a "Christ Follower". At first, I really liked the term, but the more time I spent with it, the more it left a bad taste in my mouth. I understand the reason people try to distinguish themselves from the millions of other "Christians" around them, but why do we have to invent a new word for it?

Lets be honest, if I tried to sell you a silica-based crystal that facilitated the rapid consumption of delicious liquids, wouldn't you be a little bit disappointed when I handed you a plain glass cup? Wouldn't it be so much better if I offered you a glass and handed you something unexpected and beautiful? (I'm thinking a really awesome Scooby-Doo collectible!!)

A small part of me (very small) is grateful the world has a jaded view of Christianity because it makes it all the more amazing when they finally see a glimpse of who Jesus really is.

I don't want to focus on terminology anymore. I want to focus on how my life reflects Jesus, and let him do the rest. I'd rather show people how different I am from the world than tell them.

Inbreeding?

2007-11-19T22:42:00.000-05:00

If I ever get the choice to surround myself with leaders, I think I will do my best to pick people I don't really like.

This may seem the exact opposite of what I should do, but too often I see a leadership team become a clique that is full of very similar people. While this allows them to spend very little effort functioning as a team, it can really bog down those they lead. This is even more evident in a team with many volunteers who are free to come and go as they please, yet are so vital to the success of the group. When a volunteer comes and feels "outside the clique", it is very hard to retain them. Likewise, when a volunteer has been around for a while and feels they are not as valuable because they aren't the right "type" of person, they will be more likely to leave.

Some of the most rewarding and challenging relationships I've had recently have been with people I never would have thought I'd be around. These people bring different life experiences, ideas, and opinions that combine to make the body a stronger element.

Now, this concept can create many problems as well. A team of very similar people doesn't have to work very hard to gel together. A diverse team needs to be reminded why they are there in the first place. They need to know the vision, know what is at stake, and have a mutual respect for each other and their differences. The rewards for this is a team that is stronger, more flexible, and more likely to connect to those they lead. Imagine if you always had someone in leadership that you felt comfortable with and would always listen to you and could voice your opinion to all the other leaders.

This is one thing I think my generation does really well. I have been hearing a lot about Generation Y recently. I guess a new study came out or something. Apparently, we're really good at working in teams and being in diverse environments. I guess my blog is just one example of that.

But yeah, I think if I ever get the chance to build a team of leaders, I will try to find people that may be against my "instinct" (read: people I instantly feel comfortable around because they are just like me).

Big "C" Church

2007-11-15T08:47:00.000-05:00

I'm so glad to see the new emerging Church in America. A group of communities that are passionate about seeing the word of God preached, and not consumed with their own agenda.

I've spent the last week thumbing through the vast amount of materials that churches now make available for free on the internet. Many have entire sermons available complete with videos and graphics. Others post their music, skits, messages, and promotions to give you ideas and further the cause of Christ.

10 years ago anything you got from another church, you paid for. You didn't talk to the Lutheran church down the street, and you certainly didn't rejoice when they did something controversial and thousands of people showed up to hear the gospel. But things are changing now. We can rejoice at the success of those around us. We can rejoice when we see Church grow. We can partner with Christians that may have different theological beliefs from ourselves, because we see they are passionate about spreading the word of God.

I know I gave her a shout out earlier this week, but Brittney has made the single greatest blog post I think I have ever encountered, and you all need to check it out. I can think of no better way to close that that.

Read it here.

Faith or insanity? (part 2)

2007-11-14T09:04:00.001-05:00

Several months ago God called me to the city of Charlotte. He told me that He was going to use me in a greater role than I ever imagined, but didn't tell me what that would be. He provided a fantastic job, a place to stay, a place to put my things (I had a lot of stuff), a fantastic group of friends and a wonderful church.

Then he put in my heart a hunger for more. Through my struggling with that, God revealed to me that my new job was not where he wanted me. I prayed for discomfort (it was a fantastic job) and everything went to crap. Two weeks later I could reach no other conclusion but to leave my job.

I have spent the last 3 weeks with no cash flow and honestly, wondering if I was the dumbest person alive. I know how stupid it is to leave a job without another one to go to. I know how stupid it is to leave a job in less than 6 months. I know how stupid it is to wait on God in the mean time.

Then again, I also know how stupid it is to delay obedience. God has spoken to me and given me the ability to filter His purpose and I would be stupid to ignore that.

Through this process I have asked God to really shore up my faith. To teach me to act quicker when he calls. To question less and obey more.

In my 25 years, I have never needed anything. I have been blessed with parents who provided for me. I have been working since the age of 15 and had some pretty amazing jobs. I have never wondered how I would pay a bill or if I would make it to the next month without running out of gas/food/etc.

Now, with no cash flow for almost a month, things are getting tight. I'm about to start nibbling away at my savings account and I really, really don't want to do that. I know very clearly what God has planned for me now, but I don't know the time frame. It could be months or years before he sets my career in motion, and I've really started to wonder what I was going to do in the mean time.

My good friend Brittney made a post on Monday that was really a blessing in my life. She brings up Mathew 6:26 and through that, reminded me how valuable I am to my Father. That verse gave me the encouragement to trust God just a little longer.

Tuesday, I came to work for a friend of mine on a project car that has been taking much longer than anticipated. When it's finished, I will have the money I need for a few months, but until that time, I need cash to pay bills. Today he offered to pay me to install a roll cage in one of the cars we're working on (that takes me about 3 days) and just a few minutes ago, he offered to pay me to finish a car he's renting this weekend. On top of that, he is paying me for some work I did on a house of his not to long ago.

Did you catch that? God just gave me an avenue to pay for all my immediate bills.

Yesterday I also spoke with my good friend and old boss about the job I left. Things have been pretty tight for him recently too. He isn't getting as much business as usual, and I can tell he's a little stressed by it. God reinforced to me that His timing was indeed perfect. I left my old job just before work got tight and even more stressful.

I think I'm going to trust my Father and rely on him to provide for me for the first time in my life. I think it's time my faith stretches a little bit more, and that I have confidence in the gifts my Father has given me.

Faith or insanity?

2007-11-13T14:29:00.000-05:00

I'm a bit of a dreamer according to my mother. She worries that amidst my scattered ideas and idealistic thoughts, I'll spend the better part of my adult life listless and adrift, never settling on a "secure" path. She's from the old school, where success is measured by your career path in the corporate world. Where the greatest thing you could tell someone at your 10 year high school reunion was that you were now middle-management for a Fortune 500 company. That is the world she grew up in and that is the world that provided for her and her family.

I have so much trouble wrestling with the worldly view of success, and the idealistic view. Growing up I never wanted for anything. My parents were fantastic providers. I went to great schools, had all the love I craved, and never needed anything. My dad worked for IBM for 32 years before he retired, my mother worked for over 20. We traveled around the world for the first 10 years of my life. It was amazing. I want nothing more than to provide for my children in that same way.

On the other hand, my dad's job was very stressful. He worked long hours and took many trips. At the age of 63, when I was only 12 years old, he passed away from a heart aneurysm.

The practical side of me wants to be the corporate shill. Wants to aim for the promotions and the pension and the nice house and the nice car. The idealistic side of me wants more than just an extra zero on my pay check. I want to impact the kingdom of God in a serious way. I want to stand before him in Heaven and know that my life was used to the fullest.

This is such a hard thing to balance. How many of my decisions are youthful ignorance and idealism? How many of them are powerful affirmations of my faith in Jesus Christ? I praise Jesus for the spiritual gift of discernment. Without it I think I would have tapped out a long time ago. Still, I'm in the hardest stage of my life and my walk with God that I have been in yet, and it's hard to not have doubts.

More to follow...

Why me?

2007-11-12T09:53:00.000-05:00

I am so humbled by how my God invests in my life that words cannot begin to explain it.

For the life of me I can't explain why on earth God would spend time to invest in me the way he does. Follow me on my journey this morning...

Check out what Craig Groeschel at Lifechurch.tv wrote on leadership today.

This is such an amazing concept. I want to take it beyond just staff though. Our church uses so many volunteer leaders who have real power over their teams and a real chance to connect with their volunteers. We need to challenge ourselves to take seriously our responsibility to know our team and focus on their spiritual walk in addition to our other duties.

Yesterday I took a field trip back to Newspring Church with a few of the other members of Elevation. The trip itself was very insightful for us, and so was the time spent with the 5 of us. On the way back to our car, Lindsey mentioned something about Willow Creek doing a study, finding out they made some mistakes, something something. We tried to follow what she was saying but I think none of us got the message.

This morning, while reading the Lifechurch.tv blog I stumbled on a comment made by a woman with her own blog. On her blog she mentioning Willow Creek and their research study, the same study Lindsey was telling us about last night. I followed the link to an article, and then a link in the article to Willow Creeks own site.

I can promise you a large sum of money I would never have gone that far had Linsdey not mentioned this last night. Thank you so much girl!!

So here's my Amen moment. On top of God already revealing and challenging me in an area of leadership I had neglected above, he showed me this video that must be watched.

Greg Hawkins of Willow Creek

By the end of the video I was seriously in tears. My entire view on creating disciples in the church was identical to that of Willow Creek. A strategy that does not work. I have to pull two things from today.

1. God is actively preparing me for something that he has yet to reveal, but that is so far beyond me that I have to lean on him with all my heart to have the slightest chance of success.
2. God is moving in the Church and I think we're all in the midst of the largest revolution Christianity has seen in a thousand years!!

Praise Jesus!!

So What?

2007-11-10T08:57:00.001-05:00

Passiveness is a big problem today. I truly feel it is the root cause of nearly all of the things men struggle with.

Not only do I struggle with it every day, but I grew up in a house of men who struggled with it. My father was an incredible dad, an amazingly successful business man, and could be extremely passive at times. Even as a 5 year old child I could see this play out in his life. When I got older and began to struggle with it, I made the decision to not let it grip me in the same way.

But why is it such a problem for us? If you look at Genesis 3:6, I would argue passiveness is the original sin, not Eve disobeying God. Adam set the stage for us, so again I’ll ask why is it such an issue?

I think there are a few answers to this problem.

Selfishness:
Sometimes stepping up and putting yourself on the line (ie being a man) requires a sacrifice. I think some times we are so consumed in our own little world that we won’t step outside of our comfort and be men.

Insecurity:
I believe this is the biggest one. Our insecurity tells us to play it safe and not take action. We think this is the best path because lets face it, we’ve all stepped up at one point and immediately regretted it. But how often do we immediately regret passiveness? Typically, the problems we create (even though they’re more damaging in the long run) don’t manifest themselves for long periods of time, or are transferred to other people. Because of our insecurity as men, I think many times we pick what we assume (and have been conditioned to feel) is the “safe road”.

Scope:
Our lack of scope causes many problems. We lose focus or vision or whatever you want to call it. If we can continuously remind ourselves what is at stake, what are the consequences and what are the rewards, we can get a grasp on this problem. Satan downplays things in our lives, and it’s time we bring them back into the spot light and remember how much destruction they can cause.

So what are your thoughts? There are few areas I am more passionate about and I really want to hear insight from others. Comment and let me know what your take is on this issue.

Then you're Passive.

2007-11-09T17:22:00.000-05:00

Ok, here it is. The one everyone has been waiting on.

I freaking hate PMS!!

Passive Man Syndrome….

Literally, it makes me irate just thinking about it. Like it or not, God has called us men to step up and be leaders, fighters, and defenders. However, I keep running into passive men over and over again. We think being passive is the safe road, but it doesn’t work like that bro-ham.

I am sick of seeing my brothers in Christ abuse their girlfriends emotions just to make themselves feel more secure. I’m sick of guys not being open and honest and allowing doubt and worry enter their relationships. I’m sick of guys talking down to girls. I’m sick of guys who can’t make a decision. I’m sick of guys who won’t defend their girlfriends in public or private. I’m sick of guys who are selfish in their relationships. I’m sick of guys that pretend they are better that their girlfriend spiritually.

Here’s the deal guys, get over it and do it fast! Grow up already and be a man.

If you’re going to date, make her spiritual walk with Christ the focus of your relationship. See that you are serving her in every conceivable way with a desire to deepen her connection with God. Be a brother in Christ and protect her fiercely. Don’t cause her to stumble. Don’t be a source of temptation, but one of inspiration and support. Spur her onto good deeds. That is your mission on this earth!!

If you’re lucky enough to have girls that allow you to speak into their lives, you are called to the same standard! It’s frickin time that men acted like men. It’s time to make it a priority to protect ALL of our sisters. For the life of me I can’t understand why Christian men look at their sisters in Christ as something to consume.

Consume her beauty. Consume her body. Consume her heart.

Can you imagine a world of true Christian men…

Protect her beauty. Protect her body. Protect her heart.

If you're not active...

2007-11-07T14:20:00.000-05:00

My Christian experience has been characterized by many mini-revelations that the world isn’t actually how I thought it was growing up. For example, the story of Adam that I learned as a child went something like this:

God created Adam
Adam was lonely
Adam didn’t want an animal companion (thankfully)
God created Eve
Eve was deceived by Satan
Now we all live in original sin

Isn’t that the story we were all taught? Eve did it. But look at Genesis.

"When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it." Gen 3:6 (NIV)

This pisses me off big time. For years we were taught that Eve was to blame, but there it is clear as day, Adam was with her. The whole time Adam just sat there and absolved himself of responsibility. Did he step up and protect his wife? Not at all. He stood there and watched her be seduced by Satan and fall into sin as she disobeyed God. Not only did he not violently protect his wife, but he stood in quiet defiance of God as the serpent clearly twists the word of God. I’m sick and tired of men not standing up and fighting for their sisters in Christ. I don’t know why Genesis isn’t taught this way from the beginning, but it’s time we all stop running around blaming Eve for the fall of man. Clearly, Adam was the one who needed to step up.

More to follow…

I shall fear no evil...

2007-10-19T11:45:00.000-04:00

What are you afraid of? When someone asks that question, we typically think normal things like snakes, spiders, heights, the dark…But what if someone asks “what do you fear?” Our answers might change a bit. We fear rejection, death, getting caught….

When I think of things that I’m afraid of, I usually think of things that can harm me. When I think of the things I fear, I usually think of things that have painful consequences.

So where is all this going? Earlier in my walk I often heard the term “God fearing man” or some other variant of that phrase. Before I was able to grasp the beauty of a God with so much depth, I really struggled to put together the God of love that rescued me and the God that demanded fear from His people. Then, it hit me. To fear God is to acknowledge His power and to show respect for His authority.

Think about it this way. When you’re driving down the highway and a cop pulls into your lane, what is your first reaction? You get nervous don’t you? You have a “fear” of the Police because you acknowledge they have authority and power over you. That doesn’t mean you’re afraid of them. Most of us are honest people that don’t need to worry about the Police harming us. When you’re walking downtown at night, don’t you feel safer having them around? So why do we usually get nervous when they drive behind us? We get nervous because we fear the consequences if we get caught braking a law don’t we?

Fear of God is no different. We all need to acknowledge His power over us and we all need to fear the consequences of our disobedience and sin. However just like having the Police around when you’re in a dark ally makes you feel safe, having God around in your life is also a very good idea. Fearing God simply means understanding His power and sovereignty. The last time I checked, those were also great reasons to love and worship Him too!

Can I see some ID?

2007-10-16T14:36:00.000-04:00

Where we put our identity is a very important thing. It’s how we define ourselves and to those around us. You may not know it but we all spend a great deal of effort trying to get others to see us in the same way we see ourselves. It’s safe to say we’re not always successful.

If someone walked up to you and asked you to describe yourself, how would you respond? Chances are the first thing you think about (or what you consider the most interesting thing) is how you choose to define yourself. Try it. Spend a minute describing yourself to an imaginary partner. Don’t just keep reading; really think about it for a minute or so.

Tell me a little about yourself.

What did you come up with? Was it that you’re a teacher? Play in a band? Play a sport or are in a club? Is it something you like to do or are proud that you get to do? Almost all of us at one point or another link who we are with what we do. For the longest time I based my identity around motor sports. I couldn’t wait to tell people I drove race cars because it set me apart and made me special. The problem was when the people I was talking to didn’t know or care anything about racing; I felt this immense sense of rejection. If the thing I put my identity in didn’t matter, than I didn’t matter. That was powerful stuff! How I defined myself had real significance to how I felt.

So here’s the ultimate question. If you put your identity in something you do, then who are you when you can no longer do it? What happens when you get cut from the team? Break up with that person you were dating? Have to change careers? What happens when your sense of identity and value falls apart around you?

Instead, lets all strive to redefine ourselves on who Christ is instead of what we do. If you are a follower of Christ, you have been made new and set apart. If our identity and connected sense of self worth is tied to Christ, now what happens when we get cut from the team, dumped by our boyfriend/girlfriend, or lose a job? Does anyone see where I’m going with this…..?

2007-10-10T17:46:00.000-04:00

Proverbs 18:17

"The first to present his case seems right, till another comes forward and questions him." (NIV)
"He who tells his story first makes people think he is right, until the other comes to test him." (NLV)

I always seem to be on the listening side of my friends as they wrestle with ideas or decisions in their lives. I am not sure exactly why people naturally come to me for advice or to just talk, but I am very humbled by it. When someone is willing to invite you into an area of their lives that they are confused about or struggle with, they are showing you how much they value and respect you as a friend.

One of the things I've learned through this process is how different a situation can seem to different people. It is very easy to get caught up in the story of how so-and-so wronged a person, or how a certain situation is completely out of control. When I start to hear a story about a situation, I always try to tell myself there is a second, or even third side to the story. I will usually put myself in the position of others in the story and try to figure out why a situation developed.

Of course, when the situation involved other people, especially brothers/sisters in Christ, there are boundaries. When is it OK to offer counsel and when must we send our brothers and sisters to the source?

When will giving advice spur on someone to good deeds and when is it just making room for gossip?

Are they just trying to stir something up? Are they more interested in telling you how wrong someone is instead of genuinely trying to understand the situation so that they can proceed with wisdom and love? I believe that often, we need an outsiders perspective on a situation before we can proceed with a clear head, however there is a fine line and it is very easy to cross over into the land of destruction. Make sure you filter a persons reasons and listen to their heart before you allow them your ear.

How solid is your vision?

2007-10-09T19:29:00.000-04:00

Proverbs 29:18(a) tells us

"Where there is no revelation, the people cast off restraint" (NIV)
"When people do not accept divine guidance, they run wild" (NLT)
"Where there is no vision, the people perish" (KJV)

I freaking love this verse! It reminds me of the consequences, but more importantly, it reminds me of how easy it is to lose my way. The second I lose sight of my future, that's the second I make poor choices in my present.

I'm a pretty weird guy. For example, I am passionately in love with my kids. For those of you who know me that's a pretty funny statement since I don't have any kids yet. In fact I'm about as single as it gets. Suffice it to say, it will be a long time before I get to meet my children, but I stinking love them all the same.

As a single 25 year old, it's way too easy to rush into a relationship or even marriage, but when I think about my kids, things get a whole lot different. I am not willing to settle on the mother of my kids. The woman who will raise them and teach them many of the values they will carry though their lives is the second most important person they will ever know next to Christ. I owe it to them to be patient and be picky. Without that vision I would surly "run wild" as Proverbs warns about.

How solid is your vision in life? Do you know where God is leading your family? Do you know where God is leading your ministry? Do you know what God has in store for you? Unless you have a clear understanding of what is before you (sometimes God tells us exactly what it is, sometimes God just gives us an idea), you will find it very hard to restrain yourself in the present.

How God directs our lives (part 2)

2007-10-08T16:35:00.000-04:00

I had intended to continue this topic with another story early on in my faith, but I think that talking about what God has been doing to me recently is far more interesting and relevant. If you remember from part 1, I talked about Outside Influences and how God uses things around you. In this post, I want to speak about God moving from within.

To preface this story, you need to know a little bit about my life a year ago. I was still in college at Clemson University, getting ready to graduate after my third senior year (yeah, another story for another time). I was serving at Newspring Church in Anderson, SC and was absolutely loving every minute of it. You see, Newspring was the church I dedicated my life to Christ in. It was the church I grew up in. The first church I ever went to that was fun. After one particularly awesome Sunday, I told God I never wanted to leave this place. In fact, I had already made future plans so that I could stay in town.

About a year ago, I walked into church, sat on the right hand side, 4 rows back, and began to worship God. Suddenly, a thought popped into my head.

--You're not going to be here much longer

"Interesting", I said to myself. More interesting was how I took that thought. There was no nervousness, no fear, no arguing. Even stranger, there was no doubt. I just got that thought, and knew that it was true. That's what made it truly interesting.

You see, by that point in my life, God had already stripped away the girl I was dating at the time, the job that I intended to keep after I graduated, and the plans I had for the next 18 months of my life. I had suddenly found myself in a position of total loss, and amazingly enough, total freedom. I had the freedom to answer God's call in my life and to follow his direction.

It was hardly a surprise to me when a few months later, God gave me this burning passion to move to Charlotte. For the last 7 years I had lived only 2 hours away from Charlotte and never thought about it, never went to it, never cared about it. Suddenly, it was all I could think about, all I wanted, all I was looking forward to. I knew God had put it on my heart and I knew that it was the next step in my journey. I just had no idea why.

So I did what I had to, I moved to Charlotte after graduation. Two weeks later, I came back to Newspring for our youth trip to Panama City, Florida. Some day I will have to blog about what a stinking amazing experience that was!! I am so blessed to know the most amazing students and leaders on the planet!! For this story however, you just need to know that the week was one of the most amazing of my life in youth ministry, but it was the bus ride home that was truly interesting.

The way my life was about to unfold, we were going to arrive in the parking lot of Newspring Church and I was going to get in my car and drive to Charlotte for the last time. That night would be the last I had with my students and my friends as a volunteer of Newspring Church. I should have been depressed. I should have been torn up, doubting my decision to leave, clinging onto the relationships I had made. After all, I had nothing in Charlotte but a strange new city that I didn't know.

--If this is what I'm taking you from....... Imagine what I'm sending you to.

"Interesting".

I wasn't the least bit depressed. If anything, I was even more excited than ever! I couldn't even think straight the whole way home. I didn't know what God had before me, but I knew it was going to blow my mind to little bits. God had given me the most amazing send off I could have asked for. In his amazing power, he took a moment that should have been one of the saddest, and used it to fire me up like charcoal grill with 7 gallons of lighter fluid and 1 briquette.

And the really crazy thing is that he hasn't freaking stopped!! In the last three months he has been using the desires of my heart to direct my path. He is pumping me up to a level I never dreamed of, making me a bigger nut than ever. I can't sleep at night because all I can think about is the work he is calling me to. He has put me on a path and is moving my life forward at a speed that only He is capable of and I love it!

I pray that he never stops pulling at my heart. I pray that he never stops redirecting my desires so that He can direct my path. And I pray that He never stops blowing away the expectations I have.

What happens when you tell God "no"?

2007-10-04T14:38:00.001-04:00

I look back on my past decisions, and there are literally dozens of times that God called me to act and I told Him "no". The ones that affect only me are easy to deal with, but what really messed me up were the times that He wanted me to interact with others.

You see, I worried that every time I didn't share the Gospel when I was commanded to, or show someone an act of kindness, I had ruined God's plan. In my mind I had gotten in the way.

Of course, the very notion that I could possible interrupt God's plan is completely ludicrous. I don't know when I decided that I was important enough to screw with the creators master plan, but sure enough, I felt like every time I said "no", I was doing just that.

This process revealed some interesting things to me though. Obviously, I can and do say "no" when God seeks to act through me, and obviously I cannot get in the way of His plans. So then, what does happen when I say "no"? What is the consequence of my action?

There are many answers to this question, but I choose to break it down in one of two ways.

1. God will still fulfill his plan, and he will still use you to do it.
2. God will still fulfill his plan, and you will miss out on it.

For an illustration of point number one, simply read the book of Jonah. Here we find a great example of God telling Jonah to go to Nineveh to reach the people in His name. Jonah, ever ready to be used as an example in my blog, told God "no", and ran away from his calling. God chose to still use Jonah to fulfill His plan, but here's the catch (isn't there always one?)...

It took a storm, a near death experience, being swallowed by a whale, 3 days of the foulest smelling voyage I can imagine, and only to be dumped on the shore where his next step was to preach to a city filled with people he despised. God still used Jonah, but how much easier would Jonah's life had been if he just hopped on his camel and took off? When we tell God "no" and He uses us anyways, the trip is always much harder than it had to be.

Point number two is much easier to deal with and far worse than the first. In this case, God still accomplishes what He set out to do, but you miss out on seeing His glory and His work. You miss out on connecting with the God of the Universe that wants to show you how amazing He is so that you can understand how amazing your relationship with Him is. Without that image of God's greatness and His divine power, it becomes all to easy to become stale in your relationship with Him.

This is by far the worse thing I can imaging. A slow, stale, quiet death. Drifting unheard of into the night, never making a peep. Never realizing your potential in Christ and never knowing the power of the King.

My prayer, is that we would all say "no" a lot less in our daily lives. Especially, the BIG things. The more stupid, impossible, unreasonable, and painful the call, the more God will use it to rock your face off and be glorified in the process.

What is it God is calling you to? Where have you been telling God "no"?

How God Directs Our Lives (part 1)

2007-10-03T13:48:00.000-04:00

What better way to start off my new blog than with a story of how God radically shaped my life early on in my walk. Of course, I'm certain God had many things to do with my life before this moment, but one of the coolest things about being a Christian is being able to recognize God at work, and this was the first time it really hit me.

I had been saved at a Clemson FCA event two years prior. Sadly, my life had little change to show for it. I knew that if I wanted to take another step towards Christ, I needed to get my butt to church. Thus, I began searching for a church in the area, or "church shopping" as my Southern Baptists friends informed me it was called.

At the time, I worked in the restauarnt industry with some amazing Christians. Several invited me to their church in Greenville, SC, which I of course accepted. The Sunday I attended, I was met with an odd dichotomy of classic church and contemporary worship. There I sat in a pew, surrounded by stained glass, listening to.....is that a guitar on stage?! And drums?! And is that college students wearing shorts and a T-shirt to church on a Sunday?! I mean, I know I haven't been to church in a while, but when the heck did this all change?

I wasn't really sure if it was "right", but I liked it. I liked it a lot. I learned a new word that Sunday, Worship "band". I knew that God was about to get exciting in my life, but I grossly underestimated just how much. I guess you can say my faith began a trend in that aspect, but that's a topic for a much latter time.

After the "band" was finished, the Pastor came out and preached a great message. I was really digging all of it. It felt fantastic to be around God and His word again. I wanted to wrap myself in it and learn more and more. The hunger that had plagued me for years was beginning to be satiated. Then my experience took a very unexpected turn.

At the very end of the sermon, the Pastor through the most vicious curve ball I had ever seen to this day. It went something roughly like this...

"Scientist are offending God by trying to clone human embryos. You know who wants to clone human embryos? The Homosexuals! That's who! They can't reproduce naturally, so they want to clone an army of Homosexuals to take over."

::blink:: Umm.....

Did that just happen? Surly I just totally missed something. I even turned around (keep in mind I was on the 2nd row) and looked at the rest of the congregation to see if anyone else caught that. I was hoping to see some pained or confused faces, but all I got was intent focus as if nothing out of the ordinary had just taken place. Suddenly, I was in the Twilight Zone.

Suffice it to say, I continued "church shopping" and the next week lead me to Newspring church on Easter Sunday. That was to be my home for the next four years of my walk, the place I was baptized, and the place where I made the commitment to live my life 100% in the name of Jesus Christ.

A few months later I asked my friends about the odd sermon, no one remembered it. The more I asked and thought about it, the more it became apparent that it was a section of the message devoted exclusively to me.

Later, I retold this story to some friends, and ended by saying, "If it wasn't for those 60 seconds, I probably would not have ended up at Newspring Church." Suddenly WHAMMO!! A ton of God bricks landed on my heart, and for the first time I saw how God was directing my life in the most spectacular way. I saw how God used a very public message to speak to me in a very personal way, and in his supreme power made it practically disappear to those around me.

God put a desire in my heart (to attend church), allowed me to step up and take an action (the wrong one), and acted within that decision to lead my down the right path. You see, I had been invited to Newspring months before, but refused to go because I didn't like the guy inviting me.

To me, this is a very powerful example of how God uses Outside Influences to direct our path. More on that topic next....